Gosh, I dunno. I've been feeling super anxious for the last half of today......
Just finally hit me that I've never really....done anything physically affectionate with Adam yet.....

At the moment, I just want him to come around my bed and slyly get upon it and slip behind me....His arms around my waist.... His face at the back of my neck... feeling his breath... his lips........ I won't be feeling any of that of that for a long while... But it will be worth it once the day comes.... It will be worth it. It's worth the wait.

The last hug I gave him at Motel 6....... It was the perfect hug................................

I've only hugged him 3 times.

First time was after I dropped him, Nathan and Ryan off at South Coast Plaza after L.A.
Before I left I stepped out of my car..... I was hesitant...... I faced towards him, a couple feet apart and opened my arms. "Hug?" I think he was surprised by my gesture... Ended up hugging Nathan and LOL white boy Ryan wanted a fucking hug too.

Second time was after he was done with writing 1.5 pages of my essay over at Motel 6.
We were sitting side by side on the table. Television to our left side. Door to our right side.
"Thankk you so muchh Adam!!!" I gave him a hug on his right side. A side hug.... He was the perfect height.
My arms fit around his waist perfectly and my face was not awkwardly buried into his arm or anything. I had room to breathe.

Third time. It was around 1AM, Adam walked me out to my truck from the motel room.  I really did want to give him a hug before I left but I was afraid he was going to prematurely leave me at my car before I could put down all of my stuff.  But he waited, as if expecting something more... I was relieved. As I set my shit down, I got out from my seat and turned around. My arms open once again and we hugged.  I held onto him longer this time, was hesitant about doing so initially but I ended up doing it anyway. It felt.......so.......good........ Not in a sexual way, but in a very..... blissfully melting way.

Just thinking about it over again makes my heart flutter..... Almost skipping a beat.
Adam.... I miss you....

Not sure if this even counts as a hug. But do you remember over at the motel when you were fooling around and tried to make gestures and tried to push me at getting my head near your.......you know what? But I kept on squirming and held onto your waist for dear life? I thought that was really cute....... Even though it was very piggish of you. I knew you were only joking... Well, you actually really did want it, but you'd never force me onto you like that. You're a gentleman.

Remember how I bent over to pick something up and you took the opportunity to slap my as?  Didn't react to it because I was pretending that it never happened. I secretly liked it though.

And then comes the second time around where I'm bent over again picking another thing up and you came and slapped it once more. But this time I acknowledge it and scold you, "ADAM!". You gave me a smirk and a mischievously amused chuckle quickly followed.  God damned you are so fucking sexy.

If I wasn't with Alex at the time, I would've pounced on your sexy self all the while traumatizing Nathan 4eVaHz. What is seen, cannot be UNSEEN.

I Love You Sweetie Cakey Cakez of Mine.
Miss you, miss you, really want to kiss you.

Your Signficant 1,

Dan Tam Pham