A muse that I look to that keeps me in line without even telling me to stay in line.
It's the thought of him that makes me not want to drink and get shit faced.
I keep on hearing him in the back of my head saying "I can have fun without drinking".
This is what I learned from getting drunk for the first time (this is an excerpt of my response to Ira):
It is very true, I got drunk for the first time a couple of weeks ago (yes a couple of weeks ago.... it took me that long), and I now understand why my peers are so addicted to that feeling... It's very fun when you don't think and just do whatever idea that comes to the top of your head (hopefully it's nothing retarded). But it's also really dumb at the same time. Also, I notice that a lot of people depend on the feeling of drunkenness because it makes their "confidence levels" increase because they give less of a fuck when they're drunk and they're more sociable. I feel sorry for these people who have to depend on being drunk to be able to socialize with others... It must be a very sad life...... I try really hard not to become dependent on anything (it scares me to be dependent on things).
And after yesterday's conversation on the phone, it's him that inspires me to do productive things this summer for my resumes/application for college.
I'm so fucking happy that he's got an interview with Kaplan for a tutor position and that he will be working on a Youtube series teaching..I forgot what he was going to be teaching but still! He's doing stuff to put on his grad school resume! I'm so fucking proud and happy for him!!!!! He's so fucking cool!!!
I really like him.....
I feel so lucky to have met him!!
Ivan, Cherry, Adam, Nathan and Thu are my muses all in different aspects of life.
People who I have the utmost respect for.
I'm so lucky...... The world fucking loves me....
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